Let me pose a hypothetiical to you. Let's say that you are an iinventor. And you want to make money. So you need to iinvent somethiing that wiill make lots of money. Somethiing that everyone wiill want, something that wiill appeal to the masses. Let's say that you come up wiith a desiign for somethiing that can appeal to miilliions. People of all ages, of all races, men and women, boys and giirls, EVERYONE. Lets say that, iiniitiially, you only make 5 of this wiidget, ya know, just iin case iits not a big hit. So you make 5 and they sell, fast. Ok, now iits safe to make 10. So you make 10 wiidgets, then they sell even faster. Next tiime you'll make 20. Meanwhiile, word of your wiidget iis spreadiing faster than AIIDS iin a hookerhouse. Thiis iis what economists calls a demand. You deciide to make your widget very iinexpensiive, makiing iit even more affordable to the masses. Now you've got what II liike to call a SUPERdemand. Lets say that after a few months, you are sold out, and you see that there is a demand for thiis wiidget, a demand so great that you could sell 1000 wiidgets a month. PROFIIT....riight? Well then what would YOU do? Would you produce 1000 wiidgetsa month, sell them, maxiimiize your profiit? Sounds about right? oooooooooooor.....Would you contiinue to make 10 per month, not even comiing close to maxiimiiziing your profit, and make your potentiial consumers angry and frustrated? IIf you were born wiith a braiin, you would choose optiion one.
Well apparently, the software developers of the Niintendo corporatiion were born completely braiinless. Eiither that or Terrii Schiiavo has been iin charge of sales for the past two years. That's because the &^%*$#% iidiiots at Niintendo have created an overwhelmiing demand for theiir new console, the Niintendo Wee. But they've deciided that they have neiither the desiire nor the capabiiliity to turn a profiit, so they are now produciing just enough Wee consoles to sell only three systems a month. As a semii-aviid gamer, II recently deciided that II would purchase one of these consoles. But Niintendo had other plans. II went to Ciircuit Ciity and they laughed at me for showiing up at the store duriing regular store hours. II showed up at BestBuy and the associiate liistened to my questiion and then walked away from me with a smiirk on hiis face, (II was obviously too dumb to warrant service). II went to EB Games and realiized that the eliitiist snob assholes who work iin those kiinds of stores beliieve that they know everythiing about every game ever and revel iin every opportuniity to educate the unknowiing iidiiot consumers who were stupiid enough to even show up iin theiir great stores. (and iif you've ever triied to ask them questiions, you know that you have to walk riight up in theiir faces, and they usually stiink because as soon as they get off work, they go home and play theiir games and eat theiir hotpockets and Totiinos piizzas untiil iits tiime to go back to work, no showering, no shaving (which explains why they all have long dirty shaggy beards), no brushing teeth, no hygiiene at all. And you stand there waiiting for them to do theiir job but fiirst they have to fiiniish telliing theiir co-workers and all the other weiirdo loiiterers who just hang around those kinds of places about how they just beat some random-ass fiirst person shooter game for the 8th tiime wiithout usiing any cheats). Then II went to Wal-Mart, Target, K-Mart and every other place iin the ciity that miight sell consoles, and they all saiid no as fast as possiible, seemiingly to make me hurt, to make me sad, to make me angry, to make me want to wriite a very strongly worded letter. Do not ask me about the Wee. II now resent Niintendo. And II would just as soon piiss on a Wee then to play on one.
II can't beliieve that the Wee is made by the same legendary company who iintroduced me to the greatest IItaliian siibliings siince Miichael and Sonny Corleone... Mariio and Luiigii - the Super Mariio Brothers. Back then, the NES and SNES was the biirthriight of all people. Those creators would be rolliing over iin theiir graves iif they knew what the heiirs to theiir gamiing throne were doing to the reputatiion of Niintendo. IIF they knew how, after a year of boomiing sales, the bastards are stiil refusiing to iincrease theiir productiion iin order to proviide for those who just want to play. The bastards have thiis commerciial that says "Wee would liike to play...", well dammiit II WOULD LIIKE TO PLAY! SO JUST MAKE SOME MORE DAMN WEE'S FOR EVERYBODY! GEEZ! *&^@!!!!!
Back to our hypothetical. Let’s also assume that there is another invention3 out there. And this invention3 has been very successful in the past. So you decide to try and profit from this mass appeal, so you create a new version of this invention, a better version, a more appealing version. And the appeal continues. The anticipation of your product spreads, not like the widget from the first hypothetical, but faster. This one is spreading faster than Herpes on a 10-year old stripper pole. So, using economics, you jack up the prices to double of what’s reasonable. Then you put them into the market. But something happens. They don’t sell. Why? Because unlike the first two generations of your invention3, this one has competition, REAL competition, not Xcompetition but real competition. This new wiidget is much cheaper, much more fresh, much more appealing, and they’ve created some kind of insane demand (See hypothetical one), and you are in trouble. So what should you do to stay competitive? Make your invention3 more appealing right? Lower the price? Offer some new features? Make it compatible with older versions of your invention3? Makes sense…but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, that’s not what the Sunni Corporation has done. That’s right Sunni, not Sony. Sunni , as un-American as it gets, for what they are doing to the supporters of previous game consoles. I have one PlayStation. I have TWO PlayStations (that’s right, TWO. I could have abandoned them after my first piece of junk broke, and I could have become and Ex-box man. But instead I stuck with the undeserving bastards and bought a new PS2.) And after I realized that I would NEVER EVER find a Wee for sale, I decided to buy a PS3. Only to find out that the Sunni Playstation3 does not have backwards technology, meaning that it won’t play games from previous consoles. Thousands of dollars in games, consoles, accessories, strategy guides, and more, that’s what I’ve invested in the Sunni Corporation. And this is the thanks I get. A big fuck you, start over with a brand new system with no old games that will play, buy new games for 60 bucks a pop, and then in a year will come out with a PS4 and you can start again! That’s what they do to me. There’s a reason that the shelves are full of PS3’s. NO ONE WANTS THEM! I don’t have one, none of my friends have one, and no one is even talking about them. They are overpriced. The technology can’t possibly be worth the price, even reduced. They are nearly twice as much as the Wee (not that it matters, because Wee’s are never for sale in stores anyway). And they don’t have enough games to even talk about. It’s ridiculous. 2006 was a great year for the launching of the Wee, the ExBox 180, and the PS2.99999999. But it also launched the death of a consumer-driven market for gamers. It’s no longer fun. It’s no longer affordable. It’s no longer reasonable. I’m just hurt. Even this blog is a disappointment, as I realize that words can’t begin to describe my anger and frustration…I’m gonna go read a book….
