Baby, It's Cold Outside

Blog Song: Birdland - Weather Report

DAY 1: What I wouldn't give for a snow day? I'm looking outside right now, and all I see is snow, ice, and frostbite. Yep, its cold enough to actually see the frostbite waiting on me. It's like a big bully, waiting on the playground, punching his fist into his open palm, with that menacing look. "Oh yeah you're gonna get it now..." He's looking at my ears, and he's thinking about how many different ways he can make me say uncle. He's lookin' at my nose, imaging how hard he can punch me, and which combination will be most effective in breaking my nose. He's gonna stomp on my toes, and steal all my clothes....thats how cold it feels to me. I used to love the snow, because where I come from, the first snow flake on the ground quickly translated into a snow day for the county schools. (See the picture of me looking for my car under the snow and ice). Today, I pray that it doesn't snow because no matter how many feet of snow and ice there is, I know that class won't be cancelled. And I'll have to go face it. I'll have to drive on the slick roads. I'll have to walk on the icy sidewalks. I'll have to stand there for half an hour trying to scrape ice off my car, then ill get in the car and spend ten minutes trying to scrape the ice off my fingers, then ten more minutes trying to get warm, and by now I'm late for class. There are so many things I would much rather be doing then going outside and facing that bully. Here are just a few of them:

- Sleeping!
- Warming up by the fire, looking out the window and giving the cold weather a big middle finger
- Watch a marathon of my favorite shows like West Wing, Reno 911, Frasier, The Wire, Curb Your Enthusiasm...take your pick...all day long
- Leisure Reading ("Dreams From My Father" - Barack Obama, thats next on my list, been there for a while now)
-Warm apple cider in bed
- Age of Empires II until my eyes bleed
- My Madden 08 Franchise, its been so so long
- Shave my body (i figure that would be as good a time as any)
- Do the Tom Cruise "Risky Business" routine...black people need a song to do that with....we'd have to chance the outfit too
- Spend the day trying to find a song for black people to do the "Risky Business" thing to
- more to come later....

Day 2: More Snow, More Ice. Remember that bully? That jackass of a bully that I thought was waiting on me to come outside? Well, apparently he decided to go after my car. Covered in an inch of ice, I spent the last 30 minutes scraping it off, and scratching my windows in the process. The only reason I'm editing this right now is because I thought typing would help me get some circulation going in my fingers.

Remember when you were little and your parents used to bundle you up in your thermals, then your play clothes, then your snow boots and your big bubble coat and your toboggan and your mittens (err...I never wore mittens....i meant gloves) and they would send you outside to play but you had so many layers of clothes that you couldn't move. (Think Randy from "A Christmas Story")

You would just stand there like a plastic action figure whose arms and legs were always stationery. If you fell, you would have to call for help to get yourself up. It took real muscle strength to move through those layers, and by the time you got any, it was time to come in. You could never pick up snow to make a snow ball with those huge gloves with the fat fingers. It really took the fun out of playing in the snow. Are we really too old to play in the snow?....I dont think so.....

ANYWAYS, I'm gonna have to cut this one short so that I can go put on my long johns (I guess some people still call them that...) If you ever wear them, then you know how long it takes to get the bottoms on.